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Preparing for a Potential Setback

March 20th, 2014 at 06:51 am

My younger brother may end up needing some financial help due to job loss and poor choices. I will be meeting up with him to discuss where he is and what his options are. As a result, I am taking a pretty thorough look at my finances to determine how much I can help if I decide to go that route.

I don't want to make it too easy on him but I am also not going to let him sink. It will probably be a combination of financial assistance and forcing him to make some hard financial choices.

Its a good thing that I had cut my expenses back because this could make cashflow over the next couple months difficult. We shall see.

5 Responses to “Preparing for a Potential Setback”

  1. creditcardfree Says:

    Good luck! Just bailing him out isn't always the answer, but I do understand not wanting to let someone fail completely, too!

  2. CB in the City Says:

    Yes, that's a tricky path. I have the same thing with my sister. I don't want to bail her out and I don't want to see her evicted! Trying to teach her hasn't worked in her case, but I wish the best for your brother.

  3. snafu Says:

    How are you doing with goals like eating more home made meals and reducing soda intake? Sorry DB has lost employment. What do you see as the top 3 issues DB will need to work on? Does he buy on impulse? Can you get him to actually put pen to paper and write out debts from highest sum to lowest with interest rates? Often, just seeing the facts can affect irresponsibility.

    It's so kind to try to help DB, don't let his expectations upset you.

  4. Miz Pat Says:

    I'm glad you are helping him and I'm glad you are being wise.

    I hope this is an opportunity for bonding and for you both to grow financially and as family.

  5. Caoineag Says:

    Snafu, we are doing well on eating at home more and soda intake is less than 1 per week. I think we will be slightly over budget this month for food but we were $160 under budget last month so we have made some pretty drastic and lasting changes.

    As to DB, I suspect I know what his issues are, but will confirm when we go over everything. We did a general overview of his budget in December and he was doing relatively better than in the past but keeping money in reserve is not something he has quite picked up yet and he is addicted to expensive gadgets and video games. I have also been trying to break him of the subconscious belief that he is entitled to anything. He still has a very external sense of control and has yet to really connect the dots between actions and consequences which is why I won't be truly bailing him out. I am willing to assist but he will have to bear the majority of the consequences.

    Thanks CB, I feel for you. My brother is actually learning, just slowly. I just finished this process with a long time friend and she finally has learned to budget, have savings and even make long term plans so there is hope. I am pretty good at forcing people to face reality without making them run for the hills and DB has a lot of respect and gratitude towards me so I know I can make a difference with him in the long run. It just may take a couple more years of interventions before he can truly figure this all out on his own. Sigh.

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